A Bit Tipsy
by numarg
Summary: My hunter Huntah  is a bit tipsy...he's what one would call a "horny drunk"  *snicker snicker*


**why hullo thar c; i finally edited this! it was pretty bad so i apologize. and just to clear some things up, Virginity/Vir belongs to my friend, Huntah belongs to me and if you'd like i'll link to my l4d characters info sheet to help you understand the deal with Huntah's lack of "hunter" prowess. **

**i know most of you probably don't care but eh, just in case *le shrug~***

**numanuma306 . d e v i a n t a r t . c o m / g a l l e r y / ?offset=72# / d2sbjs4 this is a picture (not the best his ref sheet needs an update ^^)**

**numanuma306 . d e v i a n t a r t . c o m / a r t / Left4 - Dead - character - info - 192529052?q=gallery%3Anumanuma306%2F4609619&qo=39**** this is the info****sheet for all of my l4d characters and umm.. yeah i put spaces in the links, was i supposed to? i dunno if not i'll fix it. **

**thoughts are '_italics with apostrophes as quotes'_**

**emphasis are either bold or _italics _depending**

**and i won't be finishing this, i've gotten reviews that i should, and i'm really glad you've enjoyed it but i can't find the energy too. sorry!**

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Virginity was sitting on the tattered, rusty red couch in the middle of the torn up living room looking bored and petting his fluffball for a son. Sighing with ultimate boredom and mumbling,"Note to self:** Don't** let Huntah go out for food or supplies." He heard a crash in the alley underneath their window of their two story apartment they had found, him and his hunter who ironically calls himself "Huntah".

_'Hmmm...must be a common,'_ and thinks nothing else of it.

Another crash along with the sound of glass rubbing against the brick wall fo the building is heard. This irratates him and he stands up, gently placing his sleeping son on the cushion next to him. He stood up and stretched some then walked over to the window. Poking his head out he looks down into the alley. Imagine his surprise to see Huntah there struggling to stand up properly with a ripped up grocery bag.

Thinking the hunter was hurt, he immediately shot a tongue down and pulled him up carefully. A panicked expression plastered on his face as he grabbed the other infected's hoodie and pulled him through the window only to have his dead weight flop on him. Thus making him fall to the floor with the other laying on top of him. He grunted and sat up to examine Huntah.

"What happened? Are you hurt? Did a survivor get you?" he paused then asked more fiercely,"Did those damn idiots hurt you?"

The hunter lazily lifted his head to look at the smoker. In a slow and untidy motion his arms were around Virginity's waist and he smiled with his teeth showing. With Huntah's lips parted he could easily smell the alcohol on his breath. It was oddly pleasant, maybe fine wine? The smoker stared at the hunter in disbelief as Huntah leaned in closer to his face and swiped his tongue across Virginity's cheek, causing his face to turn to a bright crimsom. He felt his nerves fail him and tensed his muscles.

"Are you _drunk_?" he asked regaining his overly tense composure yet still slightly aroused by the feral-like kiss.

Another lick, closer to his lips.

"'Course not silleh. Sobah as 'cin be," he smiled again.

Virginity glared at him through the blond and blue hair in his face, hoping it would disguise his discomfort and total comfort at the same time. "Get off me, Huntah." Seething now that his friend was acting this way only to be drunk. He didnt move an inch.

Except maybe to lock their lips together, Virginity's tongue hanging out, curled at the sudden contact. At this point he was officially a piece of wood, he was so tense. He could feel Huntah's mouth turn into a smirk as he felt the heat radiating off Virginity's cheeks as he blushed. Huntah slowly pulled away and shook his head so his hood would fall down. Through his aubrun hair he gazed into Virginity's eye. Dilating slightly as he tried to focus.

"Hey...Vvvir...didja' know tha' i luuuuuvvv youuuuuu?"

Before waiting for a reply he pushed his mouth against Virginity's taking him entirely off guard again. His blush increased with each milisecond and he was confused as hell with all the kissing and the force Huntah was putting behind them. Out of the blue he heard Huntah grunt out, "Let me innnnn." His voice was slightly deeper than usual, almost a growl.

_'Oh god,_ Virginity thought, '_is he trying to seduce me?'_ He was panicking more now.

He was about to protest but the second his mouth was open, Huntah's tongue shot in and explored rudely. Earning a startled gasp from the smoker now in his clutches. For one of the shittiest hunters around, his hold around the smoker's waist was surprisingly strong and locked tight. Virginity groaned lightly at both the embarressment he was experiencing and the pleasure of the kiss and the hunter's close presence.

After exploring the smoker's mouth he figured he had got his fill and slowly, teasingly pulled his tongue out. Making sure to lick the smoker's lips as they parted. Virginity looked Huntah up and down trying to find the source of his drunk state saying all the while, "Huntah...what has gotten over you?"

Finally finding the forgotten grocery bag at their side, he noticed a few glass bottles layed ungraciously in the bag. Hard liqour, whiskey, hard lemonade, sour shots mix, lemon cello...

_'All Huntah had found was alcohol. He was supposed to be out looking for supplies!'_

Virginity also noticed a good portion of the wine in the fancy bottle was gone. He figured Huntah helped himself on the way back home. That would explain things.

_'Huh, who knew Huntah liked classy stuff...'_ he thought.

"Whaaaat? I need a reezun tuh kiss mah man?"

He seemed rather defensive, that is until planting his lips on the smoker's neck, sucking lightly which led to a groan escaping Virginity's throat. He clenched his fists to the point where his pale skinned knuckles turned white.

Virginity's mind was racing, '_I am NOT going to let him seduce me while he's DRUNK. I won't stoop so low as to take advantage of this! But God DAMN!'_

Unfortunately for Virginity, Huntah was skilled in the arts of kissing, still sucking on the smoker's neck he used his tongue to smoothe over the skin. Virginity shivered.  
Huntah was pleased with the reply to his actions, he began trailing down to the smoker's collarbone. He released a "mmmm" while doing so, as if the smoker tasted absolutely delicious.

"Damnit," Virginity bit his lip and through the haze that was beginning to cloud his vision he looked down at the hunter's hair. Which was all he could see at this point. "Huntah...ahh, stop it!" he tried pushing the hunter off but his arms were beginning to turn to jelly. His self control was thinning out as the smaller infected successfully seduced him.

The hunter's grip around his waist loosened a bit as he ran his hands up the smoker's tense back and back down to his waistline and let his hands linger there.  
This caused Virginity to blush more than he thought possible.

"Huntah!" he snapped groggily, his arousal dripping off his words,"Get off of me!"

The hunter stopped and slowly pulled his lips away from Virginity's neck, leaving a nice, purple hicky in their place. He looked up at the smoker through half lidded eyes.  
"Yesh hun?" his voice deeper still and much much more gravelly.

_'Jesus he's getting animalistic!'_ Virginity's mind drew a blank as he saw Huntah's tongue dance behind his lips.

"Shit."

Virginity's mind snapped at the look Huntah had on his face. In an instant Huntah found himself on his back, still in the middle of the floor and the bag of bottles still laying next to the two. Even in his drunk state Huntah was slightly surprised.

"You've done it now," Virginity hissed. He was now straddling the younger infected under him, not even leaning down he used his mutated tongue to brush over the hunter's neck, sending a pleasant shiver through him. Huntah gasped at the touch, Virginity wasted no time. His tongue snaked it's way into Huntah's mouth. He choked out a cough then relaxed at the smooth movements of the smoker's tongue. He was playing with him, now that's just cruel.

Huntah managed a pout even with Virginity's mouth appendage wrestling his own tongue. Virginity liked it better this way, He grinned devilishly and slid his hands up the hunter's chest before resting at the hem of his hooded jacket. The frown Huntah had vanished as he was lost in the "kiss" now in full combat for dominance over the other's tongue. Though he had no chance of winning.

Huntah's eyes snapped open at the sound of a zipper undoing. Eying Virginity as he helped himself to Huntah's clothes, his gaze gave away his undeniable lust.

_'Oh? Well it's not taking advantage of if he wants it, now is it?'_ Virginity asked his nagging conscience, '_Besides, he was asking for it.'_

As Virginity slid the hoodie off his partner's shoulders he was slightly surprised when Huntah lifted his shoulders to help the article of clothing on it's merry way off him. Virginity smiled at the cheesey tanish green LG shirt Huntah always wore. What made him laugh, aside from the stick figure with a trojan hemlet on a skateboard in an absolutely ridiculous pose, was that life wasn't good. The world went to ruin all because of some sick bastards messing in a genetics lab. He chuckled darkly and rumaged under the shirt till he was soflty touching the defined stomach, belly button and rib cage. He frowned a bit, he would have to feed Huntah after this. He'd be especially drained of energy once he was done with him. His dark smile creeping back onto his face.

Slowly his tongue retreated from Huntah's mouth, it wasn't fair that it was recieving more attention than him. Huntah licked his lips lustfully while staring, or at least attempting to, Virginity in the eyes. "Ooh, Huntah, I didn't know you could make a face like that~" Virginity teased while leaning down to be level with his captive.

"Shuddap and screw me." Still slurring. Virginity wondered how long his luck would last, heh, didn't matter to him anyhow. Even if Huntah did sober up before they were done he wasn't planning on stopping.

"You'll regret those words," Virginity's old nature dawning over them both, Huntah seemed not to notice the bad omen which was Virginity's toothy smile, he was still tense but more or less like a predatorial cat waiting to pounce on his prey.

Though he didn't need to pounce, he was already on top of the younger.

"Nooooo cu-cuz I n-kno you'll take carruh me...right?"

While saying this Huntah looked deeply concentrated, he was beginning to get drowsy, and that would just not fly with the smoker. Oh no, definitely not. He sat back up and quickly grabbed the bottom of the LG t-shirt that Huntah was wearing and pulled it off of his torso with a single quick motion. Next he begain unfastening the hunter's jeans. Huntah jarred himself a bit to keep himself from falling asleep.

Virginity froze at the sound of a small mewling. He turned his head towards the red couch in the middle of the living room. Rex was still asleep, inflating his fur and sinking back into it.

'_Oh, well there goes sex in the middle of the floor.'_ Virginity kneeled over the hunter and picked him up bridal style.

"Nnng, Virrr, whu'r'u doin'?" he groaned with discontent at the thought they were stopping.

"Hush, we're going somwhere else, why? Getting excited?" That last inquiry he whispered in Huntah's ear, the hot breath making him shiver and open his mouth to reply but not words come out. Virginity smirked and planted a sloppy kiss on his lips while carefully walking towards one of the open doors in the small hallway of the apartment. he picked the last door on the right side of the building, mostly because it was the side that was attached to another building, there were no windows.  
Huntah lolled his head around to take his surroundings in.

"W-which rum aree we inn?" Vitginity just sighed and plopped his partner of the messy bed with the sheets in disarray.

"Does it really matter?" he cooed while climbing on the bed aslo and shifting his position so he was once again straddling him.

"N-no, gess not." he mumbled, his face was turning a light shade of pink. Virginity assumed it was because he was now on a bed and their situation was finally setting in. The smoker began to ghost his fingers over the hunters abdomen, feeling every indent between his ribs. They glided down to his stomach, curiously he slid his pinky into Huntah's inny belly button.

He received a small giggle in response, "Ahhh so your nose isn't the only place you're ticklish?" he asked while leaning his head down to rest his head on the other's chest.

A brighter tinge of pink illuminated his face, "Stop beatin' round the bush, Vir." Virginity chuckled and began carressing the hunters torso with hiw tongue while returning to undoing the zipper and buttons on his pants. Huntah gasped quietly, as would be expected, having a slimey mutated tongue roll and rub on your stomach and chest? He kicked his shoes off rather clumsily but at least his feet were free.

And now was his boxer covered lower half.

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**annnnnd there's the end. i hope you liked it but not too much that you'll want more ^^; i'm afraid to admit that i've moved on with l4d. this story is complete, i won't be writing more. but maybe(slimmmm channnnce) i'll write something else having to do with huntah, i don't know. welp. there you have it. now scram! lol just kidding ilu guys :D**


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